Every animal as they are born are capable of surviving on their own, they stand immediately. Human baby takes time for being capable enough to survive in this new world, it cannot occupy womb for long as vaginal i.e. natural delivery won’t support it. Thus human baby development is mostly outside the womb for more taking more 18 to 22 months. Thus it needs nurturing and support for development. This will answer – Why parenting is nurturing? Why you need to change of what used to happen long ago? Why every advice of your mother in law, mom or granny won’t help? Why you need to give enough time to the child and not just engaged in work? Why parents need to give time to child personally? Nowadays the issues around you are different, schooling is different, health issues be it mental or physical are different, technique to deal with them are different. In this time of chat-GPT or AI, and advancement of digital media, the psychosocial development of the baby needs a special attention. As the definition of stress and struggle during old times was different than what it is now. The emotional, physical and spiritual upbringing needs to be taken care of. This article shall help you in providing baby’s basic information, to avoid the stressful early days of parents and less fussy baby. As crying is a language of a baby.
💫SLEEP- The sleep requirements of baby change as they grow. Newborn sleeps for 17 to 20 hours. It may be same for 2 to 3 months baby. By 4 months sleep requirement reduce to 14 to 15 hours and number of naps reduce to 4 to 5. From 6 months baby naps reduce to 2 to 3 and sleep span is of 11 to 12 hours. You need to be more observant and careful about the sleeping cues to avoid cranky and fussy baby as their wake windows between naps are shorter for atleast 4 months. JUST FOLLOW THE CUES.
SLEEP CUES/TIRED BABY-
- Yawning
- Rubbing ears and eyes
- Not interested or looking farther
- Cranky or fussy
- Crying
- Red eyebrows or veins becoming prominent of upper eye lids.
Do not over stimulate the baby, like taking under sunlight, play loud noisy toy, giving baby to different people for interaction. It will take lot of effort to make fussy baby calm and fall asleep for next nap. Babies need support to sleep, you need to help them fall asleep. So be kind and gentle to them. Sleep is important for their overall development, as important as their feed.
After 2.5 months to 3 months the sleep cycle starts developing, be consistent and determine while setting it. It may happen that baby might wake up again but let baby play and not be overstimulated by noisy toys or interactions. Look for sleeping cues and feed to sleep. Eventually you will understand the routine of naps in a day and you can keep 1 to 2 hours of wake window before bedtime. Always follow the cues.
Pre-sleep routine- Before making baby to sleep, give a good oil gentle massage, warm water sponging/ tapping, change clothes as sleep will be longer for 10 to 12 hours to make baby feel fresh. Make sure the room is dark and has no sound. Do not allow anyone to stimulate the baby post the pre sleep routine. Feed the baby to sleep. Feeding baby to sleep is the most easiest way and less tiring way, sometime you may need rocking in arms.
Crying is a language of baby-
💫CRY- Crying is a language of your baby, which can even annoy you if you’re not going to resolve the cause of it. Below are the sounds of cry of a newborn-
NAH- Hunger
AH- discomfort/wet swaddle/ passed stool or urine
Oo- sleep
Eehh- colic
- Check their swaddle/clothes if it is wet,
- Try doing leg massage(cycling, pressing both legs by flexing the kness joints on abdomen lifting their buttocks, pressing both things flexing knee joint on abdomen) to release gas.
- Switch on/off the lights,
- Check the temperature.
- If baby cries for sleep and you distract (by noisy toys, loud sound, or light) baby, it may stop crying but again will not fall asleep easily.
- This may happen in initial 2/3 months, when you are just new to the little human.
There are ways you can handle the cry, firstly rule out the above reasons of crying.
- First and foremost offer feed,
- Rock baby fast but small movement
- Take baby out in nature
- Give to stranger
- Talk to baby
- Try holding straight on shoulder
- ride in a stroller
If mother is tired let someone else try to soothe the baby.
Shaking baby in frustration may cause injury (Shaking baby syndrome).
Baby needs minimal people to take care of them, so that there is good understanding of the baby by mother and father or the caregiver.
💫 SWADDLE-
It is most important as it keep baby compose and mimics the womb, and usually allows baby to sleep well.
When swaddling use diapers so that the baby’s sleep should not be disturbed. (I personally used Mylo pant diaper when we realised the disturbed sleep is due to frequent passing of urine and wet surface)
Swaddle for good sleep,
Swaddle for calmer nervous system,
Swaddle for emotional growth,
Swaddle prevents the startle reflex and frequent waking up of the baby,
Swaddle in cotton cloth/muslin cloth,
⚠️Make sure to not press the hip joint or try to straighten the thighs while swaddling to prevent hip joint displacement. Swaddle should calm the baby, and not make baby cry.
Swaddling can be done till 3 months to 4 months, untill baby starts fighting the swaddle.
💫MASSAGE- Bonding and fun time, and not crying time for the baby. Make massage a fun activity.
Oil-
Coconut
Figaro Olive
Soyabean
Mustard
Badam
Lal tel
For massage use oil that is suitable as per the location and the climate,eg. Badam oil is mostly suitable for cold weather and northern climate. If there are rashes which appears like prickly heat, stop that oil try another. Doctor may advice antifungal cream or antibiotics, avoid that if changing the oil works.
Crying during massage is not fine- is what you will commonly hear, but also remember crying is a language of a baby. Babies do love been massaged and make massage a fun, they enjoy it for connecting it with you. If you wake up the baby from sleep to massage, remember nobody likes sleep getting disturbed and so crying is obvious.
Please do not wake baby from sleep for massage.
If your baby is stretching too much probably it needs a massage, sleeping in same posture for long period needs stretching and movements of the joints.
2 good massages and other (2 to 3) light massages are fine for new born.
After 1 month you can keep routine of atleast 2 massages a day.
⚠️Caution while massaging- Position for massage should be easy for lifting the baby and changing positions while massage. Try not to stress baby by awkward postures, rubbing hard, or trying to shape their nasal bridge or head. Do not press nipples if there is a lump, it shall go by its own as it is due to mother’s hormones.
Go gentle make massage a fun routine.
No need to put oil in nose, ears, etc.
💫 COSMETICS – Babies dont need it. Do not use talcum powder, as it’s fine particles enters the nose while the baby breathe.
Use coconut oil to moisturize the skin.
💫 ROUTINE – It takes 3 months for the sleep cycle of baby to develop, so before that baby and even mother has no proper routine.
But mother’s hold on, it is not forever, although you don’t know how this phase may last. But one day your baby will not need you for supporting them to sleep.
It may get better by end of 4 month, when baby shall sleep with lesser effort.
Mother shall also start developing the sleep cycle by end of 3 months.
Bathing can be started after the umbilical cord is dried and dropped before that you can sponge with he warm water. The cord should be properly kept dried.
Crying is for your attention and a sign, it’s not simply fine or manipulation by the baby. Babies are the innocent soul they don’t know how to manipulate. Crying is a language of a baby.
People or relatives of new mothers should behave kind to them, rather than helping mother by handling the baby, who feels home around mother; help mother by providing food and water, feeding her if she is busy feeding the baby. Help her in taking naps, washing and folding her clothes, keeping them. As it is birth of not only baby but a mother too. Help her to breastfeed her baby as it is natural way of healing for both.
